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| Please go away. You weren't welcome before, you aren't welcome now.
I don't know what else to say. I wish there was an easy way out, but the more time passes the more it seems like the easy way out is getting farther away.
There could be a falling out in the near future. I just don't know who with.
Adieu.
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| Sometimes I wonder if I do things because I know they are important, or if I'm just tired of my constant inaction. Seems like all the important things I do stem from me getting tired of myself...
Not sure what conclusions to draw from that.
Adieu.
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| M: Does it really matter that you weren't told?
I don't even know what to think.
Whatever. I'm just here to help other people out. Just let me keep my music. That's all I have. That's all I can keep.
Time passes. People and situations change. Soon I'll be gone too. God only knows if I'll keep in touch with everyone in the future. God only knows if I'll even be anywhere near the people I know.
The time leading to the uncertainty is torture. I need to know what's going to happen to me.
I already know the answer if I stay on the course I'm on.
Adieu.
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| I leave my heart in Los Angeles.
Right where it belongs.
I've been having problems focusing lately on pretty much everything. Part of me knows what the problem is, but I don't want to admit it. It's just easier to pretend that there's something complex and mysterious wrong than it is to say there's something so simple wrong with me.
I should concentrate. Or at the very least, distract myself. As much as it doesn't directly solve problems, the art of distraction has saved me several times in the past. Now shouldn't be an exception.
To think about something other than what's been on my mind for so long. To do the things that should be important, but don't feel like they are. That sounds like a good idea.
And that begins with going to sleep.
Adieu.
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| Sometimes I wonder what that semi-permanent frown/scowl on my face looks like. At the very least, it confuses me to go from one end of the facial expression spectrum to the other on a moment's notice. And yet I do it all the time.
It might sound weird, but I wish I never had the opportunity to focus on myself. Thinking about me only succeeds in making me hate things. Thinking about others makes me try to make the world a better place. Not sure why.
And yet I need alone time to stay sane. Not sure how that works. Meh.
So much to do. So little time to do it.
Adieu.
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